Phase 4, week 7 of treatment

I tried to split this post into three sections- insights from the last week, background, and a summary of each day. If you are a friend or family member, I’d recommend sticking with the background and insights. If you’re someone who is having digestive issues, or is wondering what treatment might be like, I’d recommend reading everything.

This post is for informational purposes only and is not intended to treat or diagnose anyone. Go see a doctor for diagnosis and treatment.

Also, my brain fog is pretty intense at times. I try to make sure what I write is correct, but I may get things wrong from time to time.

Insights from the last week:

This week was rough. I’ve felt nauseous almost the whole week, my digestive system has stopped moving, and I’ve had very little energy.

 I spent a long time thinking the Fluconazole I took last week was causing the issues this week. 

Towards the end of this week I started looking into what can cause nausea and constipation. After some searching, I found that berberine (which I also started taking last week) could cause constipation, so I stopped taking it. After a day or two of stopping the berberine I no longer felt nauseous. My digestive track is still super stopped up though, which I’m really worried about. SIBO is notoriously re-occurent. One of the ways it can reoccur is from bacteria backing up from the large intestine. Since I haven’t had movement in over a week at this point, I’m feeling discouraged because it feels like the first several phases of treatment may be coming undone.

About food: This week I’ve been terrible about food. While I’m still trying to stick to low FODMAP, some of the paleo bits have gone out the window. I’ve been nauseous almost all the time, but when I eat just meat or veggies it feels worse. I’ve been eating more rice because it feels better. Some meals I just mixed some rice in bone broth and called it good. I’ve also been taking ginger pills to help with the nausea, but with limited success. I have wanted to make a big batch of soup all week, I just don’t have the energy.

Background:

This particular bout of health issues flared in 2015. My job had become extremely stressful and travel intensive, in conjunction with some major life changes: moving in with my boyfriend, becoming a Christian, getting married 2 weeks after being proposed to, becoming a step parent, then planning a wedding reception for the following summer.

 In 2016, I was finding I could no longer work full days, and my hair was falling out. When I felt that work was finally slow enough to go to the doctor, I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue and told to take a month off of work to rest. HA! It didn’t seem possible at that point. However, I did take 2 weeks off then go back at half time in May of 2016. Over the summer I was able to do less and less, and I finally ended up quitting my job in October 2016.

Between October 2016 and June 2018 I had the opportunity to learn how to rest and was able to work on a treatment plan for adrenal fatigue. I was feeling like I was making good progress in the first 3-4 months of 2018. Looking back now, I can see where I was sliding back a bit in April and May. In June, I experienced an extreme energy crash that left me looking for answers, since I didn’t think I had done anything significantly different than I had previously. In the beginning of July 2018, I went and saw a functional medicine doctor who ran a bunch of tests up front to figure out what other things might be wrong with me.

As mentioned in my post about the results from the last visit, my test results show that I have a yeast overgrowth, a parasite, SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth), and gut dysbiosis.
Previous test results indicated I have low stomach acid, nutritional deficiencies, and hormone imbalances with the adrenal glands, ovaries, and thyroid.

I have been on supplements for the hormone imbalances (previously diagnosed as adrenal fatigue) for a while. They started with my previous doctor. The new doctor is continuing to work on those issues, but with different supplements.

I started the seventh week of my 4 phase, 10 week treatment plan on October 15th, 2018. Phase 1 worked on the yeast, phase 2 worked on SIBO, phase 3 worked on SIBO and the parasite, and phase 4 will continue with the SIBO. The supplements for everything else will continue through the whole treatment period. This week is all phase 3.

I currently take 12 different supplements throughout the day. Two are a phase specific treatment pill. Three are for the hormone imbalances, 3 are for nutritional deficiencies, and 4 are for digestive support.

Day 43

I slept a long time last night- 9 or 10 hours, but have felt fatigued all day. 

After eating lunch, I’ve felt nauseous all day. Lunch is actually the only food I’ve eaten all day, and I took my breakfast pills with lunch. I had some bone broth for ‘breakfast’ because it was the only thing I could stomach.

The oral thrush is still present, so I called the doctor’s office today to see if there are any options besides the Fluconazole to deal with it. I have felt so horrible since taking the first pill I can’t bring myself to take the second dose they prescribed. I have been using a thrush paste that I made from baking soda, salt, coconut oil, and tea tree oil to try and help get rid of it. The paste few days I’ve also been oil pulling and trying to hold Greek yogurt in my mouth a few times a day. While the thrush doesn’t seem to be getting worse, it doesn’t seem to be getting better, either.

I took my daughter to a doctors appointment today in the late afternoon, and I felt so nauseous on the way to pick her up, take her to the appointment, and take her back to school.

I’m not sure if my feeling bad is related to the medicine, yeast die-off, or somethign else. I have heard from others that yeast die off can be pretty bad. I haven’t had a normal bowel movement in 3-4 days, so I’m sure it doesn’t help that I’m not eliminating correctly.

It’s past my normal dinner time, but the thought of eating makes the nausea worse. I may try more bone broth for some sort of nutrients. Maybe going back to liquid food for a while will also help some with digestion.

Day 44

It has been rather frustrating to call the doctors office to try and get additional information on side effects that have been happening. I FINALLY realized today that I have the doctors email address, and that it would make way more sense to email her.

I asked about how to handle the thrush and what to do about the lack of bowel movements and if I should be on a prokinetic.

She did respond rather quickly, which was refereshing after waiting several days for answers last week.

She said to keep doing what I’m doing with the thrush, but to add either an activated charcoal or thieves mouthwash. I couldn’t find either, but I got a mouthwash that had a few essential oils, some of which are in thieves.

For lack of bowel movements, she had mentioned psyllium husk and increased hydration. I have been on psyillium husk for several weeks now. It’s been on a lower dose than recommended, but historically, if I take a lot of fiber at once it makes things worse. The dose I have been on has been working up to this point, so not sure what has changed.

She also said I could come in and pick up a sample of a prokinetic.

Day 45-47

This was a rough week and I just didn’t get around to updating things on a daily basis. I spent the large majority of the week feeling nauseous most of the time. I felt the worst on day 46 when I went to parent teacher conferences. I didn’t really eat before I went because I felt so nauseous. I was there for about 3 hours talking to all the teachers I could. The last 30 minutes or so, I started to feel like I might pass out while standing in line, which was not a fun feeling.

I also had a hard time sleeping that night. I was super frustrated with feeling nauseous, so I spend some time looking up potential reasons for it’s cause. At first, I thought it might be related to the antifungal, but it has been long enough at this point that it feels like it has to be something else. 

One thing I searched for is why people with SIBO have nausea, and one article that came up talked about delayed gastric emptying (#4 https://www.restartmed.com/sibo-symptoms/). I read later that delayed gastric emptying is kind of rare, so I kept looking.

I found that Berberine can cause digestive side effects, one of which is constipation . I thought it was interesting that it’s really hard to find side effects on supplements, but it’s super easy to find out about side effects on prescription pills.

 I don’t know what’s going on, but something is super messed up in my digestive tract- I’ve had to resort to enemas to have any sort of bowel movement. I haven’t been doing them everyday, I wait 2-3 days in between to give my body a chance to respond. Interestingly, the second time I used an enema (on day 45 or 46) the stool was a Bristol scale 3-4, so normal looking, it just wasn’t moving.

On day 47 I decided to stop taking the berberine given what I had read.

I got 3 packets of the prokinetic on day 44. I forgot to take them for a day or two, but then I took one pill morning and evening for 3 days straight. I was disappointed to find that they did not help.

Day 48

Today my daughter had a cheer competition about an  hour and half away from where we live. My husband and I had planned to go down to support her, but we moved a little slow leaving the house.

I was pretty sluggish in the morning, then decided a little before we left that I felt like I needed to do another enema. Like the 2^nd time, the stool was a Bristol scale 3-4, which I still didn’t expect given how long I hadn’t had a normal bowel movement.

The cheer team took 2^nd place that day, which was super exciting. Everyone was tired the rest of the day, so the whole family spent time resting.

Day 49

Today was the first day I realized I wasn’t super nauseous all the time. I’m still not feeling well, but not feeling nauseous is a huge plus!

I ended up helping out in the nursery at church today. I haven’t served anywhere since about mid July when I stepped down from everything I was doing. It was good to go and take care of babies for a little while.

Later in the day, there was a corn maze event for the church. I took my daughter and her friend and we went for a few hours. By the time the event was over I was pretty tired and ready to come home.

I emailed my doctor tonight to tell her about the lack of bowel movements, the enemas, and that I stopped taking berberine. I know for sure something is not right, I just don’t know what.

Phase 3-4, week 5 of treatment

I tried to split this post into three sections- insights from the last week, background, and a summary of each day. If you are a friend or family member, I’d recommend sticking with the background and insights. If you’re someone who is having digestive issues, or is wondering what treatment might be like, I’d recommend reading everything.

This post is for informational purposes only and is not intended to treat or diagnose anyone. Go see a doctor for diagnosis and treatment.

Also, my brain fog is pretty intense at times. I try to make sure what I write is correct, but I may get things wrong from time to time.

Insights from the last week:

I got super behind on blogging, so I’m writing insights a few weeks later. I know I’m starting to sound like a broken record, but the less I sleep, the less I’m able to function. This week was rough because I was trying to recover from a big event and I wasn’t sleeping. By the end of the week I could do very little.

Background:

This particular bout of health issues flared in 2015. My job had become extremely stressful and travel intensive, in conjunction with some major life changes: moving in with my boyfriend, becoming a Christian, getting married 2 weeks after being proposed to, becoming a step parent, then planning a wedding reception for the following summer.

 In 2016, I was finding I could no longer work full days, and my hair was falling out. When I felt that work was finally slow enough to go to the doctor, I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue and told to take a month off of work to rest. HA! It didn’t seem possible at that point. However, I did take 2 weeks off then go back at half time in May of 2016. Over the summer I was able to do less and less, and I finally ended up quitting my job in October 2016.

Between October 2016 and June 2018 I had the opportunity to learn how to rest and was able to work on a treatment plan for adrenal fatigue. I was feeling like I was making good progress in the first 3-4 months of 2018. Looking back now, I can see where I was sliding back a bit in April and May. In June, I experienced an extreme energy crash that left me looking for answers, since I didn’t think I had done anything significantly different than I had previously. In the beginning of July 2018, I went and saw a functional medicine doctor who ran a bunch of tests up front to figure out what other things might be wrong with me.

As mentioned in my post about the results from the last visit, my test results show that I have a yeast overgrowth, a parasite, SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth), and gut dysbiosis.
Previous test results indicated I have low stomach acid, nutritional deficiencies, and hormone imbalances with the adrenal glands, ovaries, and thyroid.

I have been on supplements for the hormone imbalances (previously diagnosed as adrenal fatigue) for a while. They started with my previous doctor. The new doctor is continuing to work on those issues, but with different supplements.

I started the fifth week of my 4 phase, 10 week treatment plan on October 1st, 2018. Phase 1 worked on the yeast, phase 2 worked on SIBO, phase 3 will work on SIBO and the parasite, and phase 4 will continue with the SIBO. The supplements for everything else will continue through the whole treatment period. This week is phase 3 & 4.

I currently take 11 different supplements throughout the day. One is a phase specific treatment pill. Three are for the hormone imbalances, 3 are for nutritional deficiencies, and 4 are for digestive support.

Day 29

If you read the post from last week, you’ll know I felt terrible last night before bed.
Despite that, I slept pretty well for 8 or 9 hours in a row, and I feel ok this morning.

I’m a bit on edge this morning. I did a stupid thing and scheduled one appointment every day for the next 5 days. With not sleeping well the last few weeks, I know I’m more prone to feeling fatigued.

On days I’m really fatigued, driving makes me super nervous because it’s hard to track everything that’s going on, especially during busy traffic times.

The more I think about it, the more this feels like anxiety. I used to have high levels of continuous anxiety that impacted how I functioned daily.  I haven’t experienced high level or continuous anxiety for about 2 years, so I apparently forgot what it feels like.

One of the things I so enjoy about blogging daily about my treatment period is that it gives me a chance to reflect on what is happening. Once I am able to realize something is happening, I can usually take steps to correct an issue.

While 4 out of the 5 appointments are health related and would be useful to attend, I need to remember that I can cancel any of the appointments this week and the world won’t explode.

I have continued to feel anxious throughout the day. It became especially prominent when I went to my step daughter’s school to explain and kick off a fundraiser for the cheer team.  I maybe didn’t explain it as well as I could, and afterwards, I realized it would have been useful to include a list where families could keep track of who they are pre-ordering for.

I felt super anxious about not having thought through these issues, and felt even more anxious about what the reaction to the fundraiser might be.

I’m setting up the fundraiser on my own time without any assistance, and I’m having to order supplies out of my own pocket. I tried to logically tell myself that if someone was mad about the way I put it together, or was confused about the documentation, they just don’t have to participate.

Normally when I work things through that way the anxiety resolves itself. But it’s not.

We are in the process of switching from iPhones to Androids and setting up a new phone account. I ordered phone accessories from Amazon ahead of getting service tomorrow because I wanted to have everything together before I went. I accidently ordered the wrong screen protectors. Both ordering incorrectly and the thought of going in tomorrow to set up service is causing me anxiety. At this point in my journey, where I have learned to extend myself grace for mistakes, and have also learned that giving into what-ifs is a recipe for a panic attack, this is definitely not normal.

 I thought I had seen in some documentation somewhere that anxiety could be a side effect of Metronidazole. When I went back to research if the two are connected, I didn’t find anxiety on any side effect lists. However, I did find several blogs and forums that talk about the two being related.

If I’m still feeling anxious for no reason tomorrow I’m going to call my doctor and ask about it.

As it gets later in the evening, I’m finding myself feeling more physically fatigued, which is a big contrast to feeling caffeinated before bed last week on the Xifaxan. I’m not sure if I’m tired enough to go to sleep, but I wonder if trying to go to bed at 8:30 pm would be useful from a rest standpoint.

I’m realizing I’m feeling anxious about going to sleep. I remember this! It goes like this:  I’ve got a bunch of stuff to do, so I should stay up and finish it all before going to bed.

However, I have learned empirically that it is better just to go to sleep and work on the list of things the next day when I’m more rested.

It’s funny how I can go back and explain to myself the solutions to these anxiety problems now.

Day 30

The melatonin and youtube adult bedtime stories discovered in week 3 are working really well to get to sleep! I fell asleep pretty quickly, and woke around 6:15 ish, which was around 8 hours.

I laid in bed for while after I woke up since I was still feeling tired. Even with laying there for a while, I was able to get up and moving earlier that when I was having trouble sleeping. I would wake up at 9 or 9:30 am, and not be mobile til late afternoon.

I’m still feeling anxious today. The more I thought about going to the phone store to set up our new accounts, the slower I got ready. I finally just decided to ask my husband if he would set up the accounts when he got back from his work trip. There are other advantages to this- the new screen protectors should be here by that point, and if he sets up the account we can use his work discounts.

I just called the doctor’s office to ask if there’s anything that I can do about the anxiety, and they suggested L-theanine. I had a supplement called theanine serene in my medicine cabinet that had L-theanine and some other things in it, but only had one pill left.  I went ahead and took the one pill, and will try and get another bottle this afternoon. The nurse I talked to said I could stop the metronidazole if the anxiety gets to be really severe, but I’m going to try and hold on. After today, I have 4 more days on the Metronidazole, so the end is in sight!

Day 31-Day 34

This week has been rough and I haven’t made it a priority to log each day. Typically after a day is done I can’t remember what happened.

I’ve still not been sleeping well. I can typically get to sleep just fine, but I tend to wake up for a few hours around 3 or 4 am. Sometimes I can fall back asleep, sometimes I can’t.

When I’m not sleeping, it makes every thing else exponentially more difficult.  While I’ve always taken my antibiotic, there was a day or two this week I didn’t take my supplements. I haven’t been eating well this week. I’ve been able to walk the dogs every day, but haven’t felt well enough to go to the gym.

Several of my health care appointments piled up this week. I went to my counselor on Tuesday, the Rossiter on Wednesday, the chiropractor on Thursday, and had a lymph drainage massage done on Friday.

I haven’t experienced anxiety the rest of the week, and I think it’s more related to my busy weekend last weekend than a side effect of the antibiotic.

Speaking of antibiotics, today (day 34) was the last day of the Metronidazole! I’ll go to herbal antibiotics tomorrow.

Day 35

Today I started the herbal pills- Olivirex and Berberine. I honestly couldn’t remember why the doctor had me on them, so I had to do some research.

The Olivirex seems to be an herbal antibiotic, and has some other benefits. As I was looking around, it seems like several people mentioned they were taking if for leaky gut and lyme disease. 

Berberine appears to do a bunch of things, but my guess is my doctor has me on it due to it’s lab tested ability to help normalize gut bacteria. It also looks like it may help with blood sugar issues. Since I have polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), I’m wondering if Berberine will also help with my hormonal issues.

With my treatment plan, I’m to only take Olivirex once a day (with breakfast), and Berberine twice a day (with breakfast and dinner).

I took the first dose about an hour before my family and I went to church yesterday. I noticed during the middle of the service that I started to get really hot and had air hunger (feels like you can’t breath enough). I also noticed that when I rose to sing worship songs that I felt very light headed. The lightheadedness went away after about 20 seconds or so. At one point I thought about leaving the service to go outside and cool off and get some air (which is something I have never done).

I just want to point out here that just because something is natural DOES NOT mean that it is with out side effects.

About 2 hours after the morning pills, I no longer felt pronounce heat, lightheadedness, or air hunger.

I was quite tired the rest of the day, but that’s pretty normal for the last few weeks.

Phase 4, week 6 treatment

I tried to split this post into three sections- insights from the last week, background, and a summary of each day. If you are a friend or family member, I’d recommend sticking with the background and insights. If you’re someone who is having digestive issues, or is wondering what treatment might be like, I’d recommend reading everything.

This post is for informational purposes only and is not intended to treat or diagnose anyone. Go see a doctor for diagnosis and treatment.

Also, my brain fog is pretty intense at times. I try to make sure what I write is correct, but I may get things wrong from time to time.

Insights from the last week:

This week has been rough. After coming off the Metronidazole, I started sleeping much better. After a few days, I ended up with thrush, then after a few days I ended up with a yeast infection. The days in between the Metronidazole and the Fluconazole (anti fungal pill) were pretty good! When I took the anti fungal, I started not sleeping again, and have felt pretty awful since then. It’s hard to have weeks that vary so much. 

I must be sensitive to prescription drugs- 3 out of 4 of them caused me to sleep very little. I have found with having adrenal fatigue that when I don’t sleep, my capacity to do anything diminishes vastly. I have found it very hard to function, let alone to make and eat food that sticks to my diet. I will be advising my doctor that I will need to go the herbal route from here on out. I don’t think I can successfully do a treatment  (or anything else, for that matter) if I’m not sleeping.

Background:

This particular bout of health issues flared in 2015. My job had become extremely stressful and travel intensive, in conjunction with some major life changes: moving in with my boyfriend, becoming a Christian, getting married 2 weeks after being proposed to, becoming a step parent, then planning a wedding reception for the following summer.

 In 2016, I was finding I could no longer work full days, and my hair was falling out. When I felt that work was finally slow enough to go to the doctor, I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue and told to take a month off of work to rest. HA! It didn’t seem possible at that point. However, I did take 2 weeks off then go back at half time in May of 2016. Over the summer I was able to do less and less, and I finally ended up quitting my job in October 2016.

Between October 2016 and June 2018 I had the opportunity to learn how to rest and was able to work on a treatment plan for adrenal fatigue. I was feeling like I was making good progress in the first 3-4 months of 2018. Looking back now, I can see where I was sliding back a bit in April and May. In June, I experienced an extreme energy crash that left me looking for answers, since I didn’t think I had done anything significantly different than I had previously. In the beginning of July 2018, I went and saw a functional medicine doctor who ran a bunch of tests up front to figure out what other things might be wrong with me.

As mentioned in my post about the results from the last visit, my test results show that I have a yeast overgrowth, a parasite, SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth), and gut dysbiosis.
Previous test results indicated I have low stomach acid, nutritional deficiencies, and hormone imbalances with the adrenal glands, ovaries, and thyroid.

I have been on supplements for the hormone imbalances (previously diagnosed as adrenal fatigue) for a while. They started with my previous doctor. The new doctor is continuing to work on those issues, but with different supplements.

I started the sixth week of my 4 phase, 10 week treatment plan on October 8th, 2018. Phase 1 worked on the yeast, phase 2 worked on SIBO, phase 3 worked on SIBO and the parasite, and phase 4 will continue with the SIBO. The supplements for everything else will continue through the whole treatment period. This week is all phase 4.

I currently take 12 different supplements throughout the day. Two are a phase specific treatment pill. Three are for the hormone imbalances, 3 are for nutritional deficiencies, and 4 are for digestive support.

Day 36

Yesterday I started the herbal pills- Olivirex and Berberine. I honestly couldn’t remember why the doctor had me on them, so I had to do some research.

The Olivirex seems to be an herbal antibiotic, and has some other benefits. As I was looking around, it seems like several people mentioned they were taking if for leaky gut and lyme disease. 

Berberine appears to do a bunch of things, but my guess is my doctor has me on it due to it’s lab tested ability to help normalize gut bacteria. It also looks like it may help with blood sugar issues. Since I have polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), I’m wondering if Berberine will also help with my hormonal issues. 

With my treatment plan, I’m to only take Olivirex once a day (with breakfast), and Berberine twice a day (with breakfast and dinner).

I haven’t noticed lightheadedness or feeling hot with the new pills like I did yesterday. I am, however, experiencing air hunger. The air hunger isn’t as bad as yesterday, though.

I did have a bowel movement again this morning after not having one for a few days. I ate way more yesterday than the last few days, so I’m thinking that helped.  I still wasn’t hungry much this morning, so wondering if the new pills will also affect my appetite, or if it will take a few days for my body to process through the last of the metronidazole.

Later in the afternoon, as I was driving the kid around, I was noticing that my tounge felt kind of dry and weird. Once I finally was at a red light, I looked in the mirror and saw my tounge had a white coating. I assumed at that point it was oral thrush (yeast) since I had read that many people end up with some type of yeast infection after taking metronidazole.

By the time I got home, the doctors office was closed, so I’ll have to call them tomorrow to ask what to do. While it sounds like the new pills may help with the condition, I’m not taking them as frequently.

I did try swishing with salt water a few times before bed to help with the thrush.

Day 37

I finally slept normally last night! Praise Jesus!

I also had a normal bowel movement this morning. It seems like being of the metronidazole is helping my body return to normal.

I found out about a week ago that I needed to do another hormone test, so I ended up doing that this morning. It’s a home test where you need to spit in a tube within 30 minutes of waking. It’s definitely one of the easier home tests to collect!

I called the doctor’s office about thrush today, but the doctors were out, so they said they’d call me with instructions on what to do tomorrow. In the mean time, I made a paste of baking soda, Himalayan salt, coconut oil, and tea tress essential oil that I used to brush my tounge. I got the idea to do it after reading about a few home remedies for thrush. Each of the elements of my paste was mentioned as individual remedies, so I figured maybe mixing them together would work?

Day 38

I slept well again last night! So excited to be off the antibiotics!

I was talking to a friend of mine about sleeping today, and I realized that while I had trouble falling and staying asleep, I was extra sensitive to noises. I’m a fairly light sleeper anyway, but something about the antibiotics made me an extra light sleeper. I am really only noticing the difference in sleeping now that I’m sleeping normally again.

My tongue didn’t look as white as yesterday, so it seems like my thrush paste is working to some degree. I didn’t hear back from the doctor today, so I used the thrush paste I made three times today. At some point in the afternoon, I also put some plain yogurt in my mouth and held it there for several minutes. It was another thing I had read about to help with thrush.

Day 39

I had to wake up early this morning to take my daughter to school. My husband normally gets morning duty, but he went on a hunting trip so it’s my job for a few days.

I actually felt fairly decent after dropping the kid off, so I looked to see if there was a 

gym class that was interesting. I ended up going to an hour long Zumba class, and I actually did alright! I ran about an hour of errands afterwards and was still feeling pretty good.

I STILL hadn’t heard from the doctor by lunch time, so I called around 1pm. Besides the thrush, I also noticed I was on the front end of a vaginal yeast infection.  One of the doctors was in, and they prescribed me two Fluconazole tablets. I was instructed to take one today, and I can take another pill in a few days if the yeast infections don’t clear up.

I started to feel pretty fatigued around 3pm. Unfortunately, I had volunteered to do concessions at my daughters school that night since I would have to pick her up later in the evening. I figured I could be tired at home or be tired doing concessions. It was a pretty easy job, but I did have to stay upright.

I wanted to wait to take the Fluconazole pill until I got home since I wasn’t sure how I’d react to it. I ended up taking it around 9pm. I was pretty exhausted at that point, so I went to bed right away.

Day 40

I slept horribly. I was awake for no apparent reason between about 3-5 am. I was then able to go back to sleep for a bit before I was woken up by my daughter banging around. I was actually able to go to sleep for a bit before my alarm went off. I did not want to get up, but I had to take her to school again this morning.

I came home, made breakfast, and sat on the couch for quite a while. I finally went upstairs and napped for a few hours. I was still tired after the nap, but I needed to get up because I had an appointment later in the afternoon.

I have not felt good all day. I’m going to try and find some other things to help with the candida because I would REALLY like to avoid taking the second Fluconazole pill. Given how well I had slept the last few nights, I’m assuming my horrible night of sleep and feeling badly all day is a result of the medication.

Day 41 & 42

While I slept well both nights, I slept for a long time a felt fatigued all day. On Sunday (Day 42) I felt particularly horrible after church-I felt feverish and sick.

Faith for the Journey: Choosing what is better

I had a realization this morning while cooking breakfast.

In thinking about life after treatment for multiple GI issues and hormone imbalances, I wondered about how to not backslide into the old bad habits that led to poor health in the first place.

I worry that if I eventually have more energy again, that I will go back to trying to do allllll the things and then some, that I’ll go back to eating poorly, that I will put some other thing or activity in place of God again.

These thoughts came up in a counseling session a few weeks back, and my counselor assured me it would be quite hard for me to backslide that hard and forget everything I have been learning.

I try not to allow these thoughts air-time in my brain for very long, but I feel them in the background gnawing at me.

A few months back I had an encounter with Mary of Bethany. She appears in three different stories of the Bible, and in each story, she is at the feet of Jesus. Ever since I read all three stories I keep thinking about her.

I keep being drawn back to one single verse about Mary in Luke 10:42. Jesus and his disciples were on their way somewhere when Martha opened her home to them. Martha was busy preparing the food for all her guests, and was frustrated that her sister Mary sat at Jesus’ feet listening to his teachings and not helping her with the preparations. When Martha asked Jesus to get Mary to help her, he told Martha she was upset about many things… “but few things are needed--or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

Mary has chosen what is better.

Mary CHOSE.

She didn’t trip and fall near Jesus, then just sit there. She wasn’t there by accident.

Mary CHOSE what was better! 

AND! 

It would not be taken from her.

My realization this morning was this:

In life after treatment, I can also choose what is better!

AND!

It will not be taken away from me!

If I had to guess, 90% of my health issues have been caused by anxiety and stress over a period of several years.

I think one contributing factor to my anxiety is that I was never taught stress coping techniques.

I believe another contributing factor is our American culture. Amongst other things, we seem to value high productivity, putting work above oneself, being independent (which of course requires a good job and making lots of money), and being ‘perfect’. If that’s not a recipe for way too many responsibilities, unrealistic expectations, and maxed out capacity then I don’t know what is!

Maybe it’s just me, but from being immersed in mainstream TV and marketing from a young age it seemed like if I didn’t have all my ducks in a row and look good doing it then something was wrong with me. If I didn’t have a house, husband, at least one kid and a dog by 25 then I was damaged goods (some guy on a plane actually said those words to me…’girl, you’re damaged goods). That my worth was tied to my relationship with a man and what material goods I could collect.

And I believed all of it!

I remember talking about life balance in college and in my early years of working and wondering why I didn’t have it. Cause to have all your ducks in a row and look good doing it you had to have balance, right?  Like balance was a thing that just happens. Like balance is a thing that is magically bestowed upon you.

If you have ever done balancing poses in yoga, then you know balance doesn’t just happen. The people who tend to have the best balance in class make balance a practice. That means they do it repeatedly and get good at it. Balance isn’t an accident.

Why yes, I did take this photo just for this post in my PJ's.

 Just keeping it real, y'all!

Do I get bonus picture points for Maizey doing

 downward dog in the background?

One of the big skills I’m learning right now, in my mid-thirties, is how to set boundaries. Man, I wish someone had told me about healthy boundaries when I was in high school! I believe it is the single biggest thing I could have done to prevent stress.

Much like balance, boundaries are a practice. Boundaries also take work to set an maintain. It’s not like a boundary is taping a sign to yourself that says ‘I do not go out after 7pm on week nights’, and then everyone sees and is like ‘ok, cool’.

There will always be things to do and people asking me to do them. It’s within my right to say no and choose what is better.

Dear Reader, in the event you are also interested in learning about boundaries, my counselor recommended an awesome book that I would also highly recommend (even though I’m only part way through it): Boundaries by Townsend and Clouds

In Luke 10:42, the better thing that Mary is choosing is the word of God. Mary Is choosing Jesus over expectations of the world and of other people.

I have only been a Christian for about three and a half years. I have spent about two and a half years of that time struggling with health issues. I see how God is using this time to unwind all my previous misconceptions of what was required of me. I don’t have to be independent and highly productive and ‘perfect’. I’m not damaged goods because I got married at 32. My worth is not tied to my marital status or the expectations placed on me.

My worth is tied to God and who He created me to be for the good works He has prepared for me.

It is so humbling to look back on where I was and where I am now. That Jesus, the good shepherd, would leave the 99 sheep to pursue me. And not only did He pursue me, but He would and love me right where I was at, even though I was a sinner and had not yet placed my faith in Him. That I was worth so much to Him that He would give His life for me.

Jesus gave His life willingly for me, and loves me even though:

•       I can no longer hold a job
•        I don’t have energy anymore
•        My hair is falling out
•        My hormones are messed up
•        My digestive tract is messed up
•        I get irritable when I don’t sleep
•       I can no longer do what the world expects
•       Etc.

He loves me for me, right where I’m at. My worth comes from being a daughter of God, not from my physical condition, and not from meeting expectations of the world.

To finally be at a place where I know that logically AND emotionally/spiritually is priceless. It also allows me to feel a tremendous amount of freedom, because I can reject the expectations of the world/other people and really embrace the expectations God has for me.

The freedom that is given by God allows me to choose what is better.

And you know what?

    It will not be taken away from me.

Faith for the Journey: Cherries

This experience occurred on July 5, 2018. I wrote it down a few days later.

________________________________________________________________________________

The neighborhood in which I live has a pool at the center of it, and around the pool there are different kinds of fruit trees that have been planted.

About a week ago while walking the dogs I noticed that the cherry trees were bearing fruit, and I picked a few to eat as we walked by. The cherries were bitter tasting, not ones you’d want to go and pick more of.

Later that night, out of curiosity, I consulted google about bitter cherries. To my surprise, I found that there are several varieties of sour cherries, and that the cherry trees in our neighborhood were indeed of the sour variety.

I then did what any other food loving person would do: I researched how one could bake with sour cherries.

I found a few great recipes, but one stuck out. I had found a recipe for a sour cherry clafoutis, which is kind of like a fruity quiche/custard. I told my husband that the next day we needed to go and pick a bunch of cherries. We noticed that there were a bunch of cherries that weren’t ripe yet, but would be ripe after several days.

We came back with about 5 pounds of cherries and I made the sour cherry clafoutis, and it was amazing!

Knowing that there would be more cherries that would ripen, I waited several days to go back.

As I approached the trees for my second round of picking, I noticed how heavy the branches were with fruit, and how the bright red cherries contrast so nicely with the dark green leaves.

I thought to myself ‘Oh, to bear spiritual fruit like that!’

What would it be like to abide in Jesus so deeply, that spiritual fruit would hang in glorious abundance?

As I picked, there were other thoughts:

‘look how plentifully He provides!’

‘I have so many cherries, what will I do with them all?’

‘There are so many more cherries I’m not picking….I’ll have to come back another day to pick more’

‘With such a bountiful harvest, wouldn’t it be great to share with others instead of hoarding all these cherries for myself? Will they not create more joy when shared vs stored in my freezer?’

I returned home with all the cherries I could carry.

The fruits of the spirit are love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.

At the time, I was in the middle of a health crisis and couldn’t fathom how one could experience all the fruits of the spirit when you are experiencing trials. Specifically joy. James talks about rejoicing when you experience trials of any kind, but I had no idea how to do that.

I wasn’t sure I even really understood what Joy was in the Christian sense, so I googled it. I ended up finding a short, 6 part series by John Piper where he defines joy, and talks about other facets of joy, including thoughts about joy in suffering.

The videos gave me a new way to view the trial that I was in, and that helped me to be receptive to future teachings that would experience.

Faith for the Journey: Ripples

This experience occurred on June 4, 2018. I wrote it down a few weeks later. I didn’t know it then, but this would be the foundation for many teachings that would come over the next few months.

_________________________________________________________________________________

Sometimes being a step-parent is hard. 

Sometimes it’s hard AND painful.

Step-parent pain was the place I found myself in on a Monday morning. When you have truly adopted a child in your heart, sometimes the reminders that they are not yours, and will never be, cause a deep ache.

I was taking my stepdaughter and her friend to target that morning after a sleepover, and I knew I needed to hear from Jesus. On the way back home, I took a detour to a natural area with ponds. I don’t remember if I went with a question, or just with a pain in my heart.

It was a beautiful day; the sky was clear and bright blue. I parked my Jeep and walked the crunchy gravel path to the closest pond.  There was a slight breeze, which tousled the leaves of the trees, creating an intermittent rustling noise. Upon arriving at the water, I felt prompted to take my shoes off and walk around in the water.

Walking around in the water is not something I normally do if I’m not going swimming. Your feet get wet, then sand and dirt sticks to your feet and you have no way to wipe them off because there’s no towel. The worst part is you then you have to put your shows back on with sandy feet. It’s really not my thing.

But then there was the persistent tug: take your shoes off…walk in the water.

I thought to myself ‘why not’? If this is the Holy Spirit talking to me, I would like to be obedient. If it’s not, well, sandy shoes aren’t the worst thing to happen in life.

So, I slipped my Keens off, put down my purse and ventured out into the water. I walked back and forth a bit on the shore, noticing the way the shadows of the trees didn’t just sit on the surface of the water, the shadows went to the surface on which I was walking.

After a minute or two I walked out of the water, sat down, and looked up. No longer focusing on the shadows where my feet had been, I looked out across the pond and saw that the ripples created by my walking along the shore had reached the other side of the pond.

Then this realization hit me: when we walk with Jesus, we create ripples! Ripples that others can see!

Just as soon as the realization had crossed my mind, two fish in the middle of the pond came up to the surface and created ripples of their own. Without thinking, I jumped to my feet and started stomping wildly so that the ripples they made wouldn’t get to the shore on which I was sitting. It took a lot of stomping to diffuse the fish ripples.

The next realization came: when we stop walking with Jesus, ripples from other things or people are more likely to get to us and affect us. At that point, we have to work much harder in our walk to not be affected.

Seeing that the fish were active, I stayed in the water, walking in place. The ripples I created were consistent this time because I kept my feet moving. This time when the fish surfaced, the ripples they created were diffused farther away from the shore on which I was walking because I was continuously sending out ripples.

Then came the final realization: when we walk with Jesus consistently, things of the world don’t affect us as much, because being with Him creates ripples that are stronger than those of the world.

Phase 2/3, week 4 of treatment

I tried to split this post into three sections- insights from the last week, background, and a summary of each day. If you are a friend or family member, I’d recommend sticking with the background and insights. If you’re someone who is having digestive issues or is wondering what treatment might be like, I’d recommend reading everything.

This post is for informational purposes only and is not intended to treat or diagnose anyone. Go see a doctor for diagnosis and treatment.

Also, my brain fog is pretty intense at times. I try to make sure what I write is correct, but I may get things wrong from time to time.

Insights from the last week:

There was a lot that happened over the past week. I switched treatment pills, participated in wedding festivities, and my step daughter was at our house this week.

With the new treatment pill I thought sleeping wouldn’t be an issue, but it turns out I was wrong about that. I have been more fatigued this week than previous weeks and therefore had trouble tracking symptoms in the app I use, and there were some days I missed some of the supplements I take in liquid.

I realized that when I have expectations on how a day will go and then something changes and I can’t do things in the same order or need to delay a task that it causes me stress. Now that I realize it’s happening I can address my level of expectation.

Even though I have several issues with my digestion, the symptoms I experience most frequently and with higher severity are related to stress and hormones.

With starting the new treatment pill, there have been some new side effects: loss of appetite, weird taste in the mouth and dark colored urine. There have been some like trouble sleeping and feeling light-headed, that have stayed the same. With the lightheadedness, I only notice it on days I have experienced higher stress or didn’t sleep well.

At my doctor’s recommendation, I tried melatonin to help me sleep later in the week, and it appears to be helping.

I had a few conversations this week that made me realize that I may be isolating myself more than I realized. I also found that conversations that focus solely on my physical issues are draining, whereas conversations that include faith are energizing and uplifting. I need more faith-filled conversations!

Many people ask if I’m getting better. That’s actually not a straightforward question. I physically do not feel good because of lack of sleep and because of some of the treatment side effects. It is possible that my body is getting better even though I’m not capable of noticing at the moment.
This treatment plan is heavily focused on my digestive issues.

 As previously mentioned, my more prevalent issues have to do with stress and hormones. I have been on supplements that help support my hormone issues for several years now. The new doctor has switched the brands of hormone support supplements I’m on, but the glands that are supported are the same (adrenal, thyroid, ovaries).

While I’m hopeful that treating the digestive issues will help my body overall, I’m trying to be realistic with how I may feel at the end of the treatment plan at the beginning of November. It may very well be that I still feel fatigued.

 I’ve had hormone issues since at least 2001, and I started to see a counselor for anxiety in 2005 or 2006. I had digestive issues since at least 2009. That’s 17 years of thrashing my internal bits to some degree. I’m not sure if one 10 week treatment plan is going to ‘fix’ ALL the things that are wrong.

The way I’m thinking about it is that my digestion will hopefully improve after the treatment, and after it’s working better for a while it will help the other body systems function better. I don’t know if anyone can give an exact timeline for how that might go.

So, am I getting physically better? Probably. It at least seems like the treatment plan helps with forward motion.

I'm happy to report that emotionally and spiritually I'm doing really well. With the help of a counselor, I'm unwinding the poor mental wiring that I feel led me to make poor life decisions which in turn led to the extreme stress I experienced a few years back.

On a spiritual level, I'm learning so much. My faith is growing exponentially and I am able to share that faith with others. I have several blog posts about faith planned that I haven't had time to write yet, but you'll be able to find links to them here when I do.


Background:

This particular bout of health issues flared in 2015. My job had become extremely stressful and travel intensive, in conjunction with some major life changes: moving in with my boyfriend, becoming a Christian, getting married 2 weeks after being proposed to, becoming a step parent, then planning a wedding reception for the following summer.

 In 2016, I was finding I could no longer work full days, and my hair was falling out. When I felt that work was finally slow enough to go to the doctor, I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue and told to take a month off of work to rest. HA! It didn’t seem possible at that point. However, I did take 2 weeks off then go back at half time in May of 2016. Over the summer I was able to do less and less, and I finally ended up quitting my job in October 2016.

Between October 2016 and June 2018 I had the opportunity to learn how to rest and was able to work on a treatment plan for adrenal fatigue. I was feeling like I was making good progress in the first 3-4 months of 2018. Looking back now, I can see where I was sliding back a bit in April and May. In June, I experienced an extreme energy crash that left me looking for answers, since I didn’t think I had done anything significantly different than I had previously. In the beginning of July 2018, I went and saw a functional medicine doctor who ran a bunch of tests up front to figure out what other things might be wrong with me.

As mentioned in my post about the results from the last visit, my test results show that I have a yeast overgrowth, a parasite, SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth), and gut dysbiosis.
Previous test results indicated I have low stomach acid, nutritional deficiencies, and hormone imbalances with the adrenal glands, ovaries, and thyroid.

I have been on supplements for the hormone imbalances (previously diagnosed as adrenal fatigue) for a while. They started with my previous doctor. The new doctor is continuing to work on those issues, but with different supplements.

I started the fourth week of my 4 phase, 10 week treatment plan on September 24th, 2018. Phase 1 will work on the yeast, phase 2 will work on SIBO, phase 3 will work on SIBO and the parasite, and phase 4 will continue with the SIBO. The supplements for everything else will continue through the whole treatment period. This week has some of phase 2 and 3.

I currently take 11 different supplements throughout the day. One is a phase specific treatment pill. Three are for the hormone imbalances, 3 are for nutritional deficiencies, and 4 are for digestive support.

Day 22

The wheels are starting to come off the cart a bit. I woke up late. I took my treatment pill after I woke up, but didn’t eat anything until noon. I forgot my liquid supplements this morning because I typically take them with breakfast, but I didn’t actually eat breakfast.

I had a somewhat stressful conversation this morning, and decided that if I ate my feelings in the form of potato chips that would probably be fine. The things I did today felt rushed because I didn’t leave the house for errands until 3:30ish, and I needed to have dinner ready at 6:30.

I know most of my poor choices today are due to feeling tired and then feeling rushed because I’m sleeping so late. At this point, I’ll take sleep whenever I can get it.

Switching topics- this has been the third or fourth day using the squatty potty and it’s awesome.

It’s about 8:30pm and the wired/tired feeling is already present. I’m going to try and go upstairs and get in bed sooner and see if I can actually fall asleep earlier. I have just been staying up and going with the wired feeling, so I have been awake much later.

Tomorrow will be a hectic day, so going to bed earlier would be super helpful if I can manage it.

Day 23

While I did fall asleep sooner last night, it was super windy, and the wind woke me up a few times in the middle of the night.

Today has been long and I’m at the point later in the evening where I’m fatigued and can’t quite make whole thoughts.

I craved junk food today, wondering if it’s because I’m not getting enough calories?

Day 24

Today is the last day on Xifaxan! Still didn’t sleep well despite going to bed early again last night (those bedtimes stories for adults on youtubethat I mentioned in the week 3 post are really helping in getting to sleep!).

I mentioned in an earlier post that I try and chart my symptoms, foods, medicines, etc. in an app called my symptoms. I’ve been really bad at that the last few days. I’m not sure if it’s because I stopped caring, or it’s because I lack motivation from being tired.

Typically, I would feel stressed about not having kept up on tracking everything. At this moment:
 I.just.don’t.care.

I’m both excited and nervous to be switching pills tomorrow. Excited because I’m hoping to sleep better. Nervous because I’m a bridesmaid in a wedding this Saturday and I don’t know what new side effects, if any, might pop up.

The rehearsal dinner is tonight and I did ok energy wise!

Day 25

 No change in sleeping or fatigue level. I started the new treatment pill (Metronidazole) today, and it tastes pretty bad. The taste lingers after the pills taken, but it’s not over powering. I did feel a little nauseous after taking the second dose, but it’s possible that was due to car sickness.

I didn’t feel great after taking the 3^rd dose this evening, but not sure if that’s related to the pill or not. 

I’ll be interested if I sleep better tonight.

I’m hoping that if I start sleeping better that I can start going back to doing some elliptical workouts at the gym this week.

Day 26

I slept worse last night than the previous few nights. I had a weird bowel movement this morning….it looked mostly normal, but there were parts that looked grainy.

I was looking up the side effects of Metronidazole on stool when I found this:

  

Wayyyyyy down on the bottom of the page I did find that trouble sleeping IS a side effect! DANG IT!

Trouble sleeping was not mentioned in the sheet that came from the pharmacist.

I’m feeling super fatigued right now. I’m getting real tired of the whole not sleeping thing, so I called the doctor and asked if there was anything I could do to help with sleeping. She mentioned natural calm, melatonin, and CBD oil. Since I already have natural calm, I opted to try the melatonin. I would have no trouble trying CBD oil, except for that it’s rather expensive, and I’m only on these pills another week or so. I got some melatonin on the way to the vet appointment, so we’ll see how that works.

As I’m re-reading the entry for this day, I’m wondering why I didn’t ask my doctor sooner about help with sleeping. I’m going to blame it on brain fog and not thinking clearly.

Day 27

Today was a big day! My best friend got married, and I was a bridesmaid in the wedding. I left the house around 10:15 am and didn’t get back til around 9:30pm. With events like this, it seems like I get surges of adrenaline that will carry me through an event. I did notice that I would get tired when there were periods throughout the day when we were sitting and waiting on the next thing. This happened at least 3 times.
But it was oh-so-worth it! What a joyous occasion!

I slept about 8 hours last night! Not sure if it was the melatonin, or if I’m so exhausted from not sleeping the last few days that I kind of crashed. 

I didn’t have a bowel movement today, and I didn’t stick as closely to my eating plan as I should have. Since my symptoms are more hormonal in nature, I figured a little bit of cheating would do much to my digestion, especially since the foods I ate were still low FODMAP, just not paleo.

Since I’ve been failing at entering things into my symptom tracker, I don’t remember if I took any psyillum husk yesterday. I did well with bringing and taking my pills. I just didn’t bother taking the supplements, like the psyillum, that I typically add to a liquid.

I rode down to the wedding with a friend of mine who is having some similar health issues. It was so good to talk to someone who understands what it’s like to have chronic stuff! We also spent a good deal of time talking about faith, and Jesus, and staying connected. 

It’s so easy (and mentally draining) to focus on the physical, that when I get a chance to talk about and focus on the spiritual it’s like a battery recharge!

It’s making me realize I need to be connecting with people and having spiritual conversations at least once a week, if not more.

Day 28

 Today has been a little rough, as I suspected.

I was able to go to sleep at a reasonable time, but woke up several times in the middle of the night, then woke up at 6:15 ish because of low blood sugar. When I finally ate a little I was able to go back to sleep for a bit.

I was fatigued for most of the day. I was able to rest after we came home from church, but not sleep. 

A few friends from church set up a meal train for me a few weeks ago and we received two different meals today. With all the wedding festivities going on the last few days, I haven’t been making food. I now have food for a few days, so I’m super grateful for those who brought meals today!

After the evening metronidazole dose, I noticed I had a headache and felt a little light headed.

One of the Metronidazole side effects I read about was urine that was darker than normal, which I noticed last night and this morning. Today I tried to drink more water than normal in the event I got dehydrated from yesterdays events. I’m at about 2.5 liters for the day.

Speaking of side effects, one that I forgot to mention is loss of appetite. I find that it’s especially prevalent in the morning. Since I normally update the post in the evenings, I always forget to write about it.

This evening, I did notice that I wasn’t really hungry for dinner. However, once I started eating it, I wanted more as soon as I was finished.

After dinner my headache was growing worse and I felt overtired. I went to lay down around 9:15 or so. I laid there for a while and continued to feel worse.  The headache became the worst I can remember, and I started to feel nauseous. After 15 to 20 minutes I ran to the bathroom, because it became a situation where there was going to be something that came out of some orifice.
Surprisingly, I had a normal bowel movement, but while it was occurring I had chills and felt like I might pass or throw up.

When I went back to bed the headache had lessened, but I still felt shaky and had chills. Despite all of that, I actually slept pretty well!

Phase 2, week 3 of treatment

I tried to split this post into three sections- insights from the last week, background, and a summary of each day. If you are a friend or family member, I’d recommend sticking with the background and insights. If you’re someone who is having digestive issues, or is wondering what treatment might be like, I’d recommend reading everything.

This post is for informational purposes only and is not intended to treat or diagnose anyone. Go see a doctor for diagnosis and treatment.

 Also, my brain fog is pretty intense at times. I try to make sure what I write is correct, but I may get things wrong from time to time.

Insights from the last week:

 I have not slept well this week, so my adrenal fatigue symptoms are getting worse again. I looked into Xifaxan side effects, and trouble sleeping appears to be one of them. For lack of a better term, I feel caffeinated, especially in the evenings. Another Xifaxan side effect I had was feeling off-balance/lightheaded. That symptom faded over time, but did show up again one day this week when I was feeling particularly fatigued.

On days I’m feeling fatigued, it’s really nice to just have meals that are ready to eat. I’ve decided that if there is a day I feel decent it would be beneficial to cook something in bulk.

I bought the Monash University FODMAP app this week, and I wish I would have just spent the $8 sooner. I didn’t realize that food serving sizes are necessary in determining if something is high FODMAP or not. A serving of a particular veggie might be fine at 1/3 c, but at ½ c becomes high FODMAP. I was really frustrated with not knowing about that.

I also got a squatty potty this week on sale. I forgot to update about it on the daily posts, but I have found that it really helps have more comfortable and faster bowel movements (especially for someone that tends towards constipation).

In the continuing battle to get to sleep/sleep better/sleep more, I discovered bed time stories for adults on you tube. This has been a great find for me, and I do think it helps me fall asleep faster than I would on my own.

From day 21:

 In listening to the bedtime stories, I learned something about focus that relates to my life in general. As I listen, my mind sometimes wanders and fixates on something- a conversation from earlier in the day, what needs to be done tomorrow, conversations I need to have, etc.
When I realize that my mind has drifted, it is possible for me to choose to continue with where my mind wants to go, or to return my focus to the story. Sometimes I choose to refocus on the story, and I can stay there. Most of the time I choose to focus on the story, and my mind drifts back to what I was thinking about again and again and again. Each time I realize the drift has happened, I can choose to refocus on the story.

I have a whole set of blog posts planned about the faith aspect of this journey that I haven’t finished yet. They are separate posts because that’s how I’ve operated the last few months- I focus on the physical, then I focus on the spiritual. Sometimes I spend more time focusing on the physical than I would like. I do need to be aware of the symptoms I am experiencing, but obsessing about them isn’t helpful. Being aware of the food I’m eating is necessary, but beating myself up for making a food mistake isn’t helpful.
Jesus once told his disciples: "My food," said Jesus, "is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work. John 4:34 NIV
Truly, it is spiritual sustenance that is keeping me going at this time.
Today I even moved on from ‘just keeping going’ to the type of sincere gratitude that makes you emotional all day. God has been SO GOOD to us, I can see and feel how in all things He has been/is working for the good of those who love Him, and have been called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

  

Background:

This particular bout of health issues flared in 2015. My job had become extremely stressful and travel intensive, in conjunction with some major life changes: moving in with my boyfriend, becoming a Christian, getting married 2 weeks after being proposed to, becoming a step parent, then planning a wedding reception for the following summer.

 In 2016, I was finding I could no longer work full days, and my hair was falling out. When I felt that work was finally slow enough to go to the doctor, I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue and told to take a month off of work to rest. HA! It didn’t seem possible at that point. However, I did take 2 weeks off then go back at half time in May of 2016. Over the summer I was able to do less and less, and I finally ended up quitting my job in October 2016.

Between October 2016 and June 2018 I had the opportunity to learn how to rest and was able to work on a treatment plan for adrenal fatigue. I was feeling like I was making good progress in the first 3-4 months of 2018. Looking back now, I can see where I was sliding back a bit in April and May. In June, I experienced an extreme energy crash that left me looking for answers, since I didn’t think I had done anything significantly different than I had previously. In the beginning of July 2018, I went and saw a functional medicine doctor who ran a bunch of tests up front to figure out what other things might be wrong with me.

As mentioned in my post about the results from the last visit, my test results show that I have a yeast overgrowth, a parasite, SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth), and gut dysbiosis.
Previous test results indicated I have low stomach acid, nutritional deficiencies, and hormone imbalances with the adrenal glands, ovaries, and thyroid.

I have been on supplements for the hormone imbalances (previously diagnosed as adrenal fatigue) for a while. They started with my previous doctor. The new doctor is continuing to work on those issues, but with different supplements.

I started the third week of my 4 phase, 10 week treatment plan on September 17th, 2018. Phase 1 will work on the yeast, phase 2 will work on SIBO, phase 3 will work on SIBO and the parasite, and phase 4 will continue with the SIBO. The supplements for everything else will continue through the whole treatment period. This week was all phase 2.

I currently take 11 different supplements throughout the day. One is a phase specific treatment pill. Three are for the hormone imbalances, 3 are for nutritional deficiencies, and 4 are for digestive support.

Day 15

At this point, I’m sure one of the Xifaxan side effects I have is trouble sleeping. It is starting to kick my butt. It’s about 9:30 pm right now and I feel a bit like a zombie- fatigued, but not very sleepy.

I think the off balance/light headedness is either starting to fade, or I’m getting used to it.

I’m not as hungry as when I first started taking Xifaxan, so that side effect has also faded.

I’m still irritable most days, but I don’t know if that’s a direct side effect, or if it’s more related to not sleeping.

While I slept 8 hours last night, I’ve been getting 5-6 hours for the last several days before that, and I’m not caught up at all.

It took me a long time to get motivated to get going today. I needed to run a few quick errands then make a few batches of soup for this week. I also needed to make dinner for some friends we had over. Even though I was feeling fatigued, once I got going I was able to keep going.

We don’t have my step daughter this week, and my husband is going out of town for a few days, so I’ll have 2 whole days where I will have the house all to myself. I really like days home alone when I’m not sleeping well, because it’s much more quiet and there’s less going on. The less sleep I get, the more irritable I get. The more irritable I get, the less I can handle extra activity and noise.

 I also don’t have to cook for other people. While I do like cooking, I also like leftovers. Like, I can eat left overs almost indefinitely. My family, on the other hand, can only eat the same meal 2-3 times before they refuse to eat any more of it. Between the soup and the dinner I made today, I probably wont have to cook until next week.

Day 16

I finally slept a little longer last night, something between 8 and 9 hours.  Still not caught up on sleep, and feeling pretty fatigued today. I’m so glad I don’t have to worry about cooking the rest of the week. If the trend of not getting enough sleep continues, I’ll very likely be non-functional by the end of the week.

I’m still having daily bowel movements, though the last few were a Bristol scale 2-3, so towards the constipated side. I’m still glad things are moving and not just hanging out in my intestines.

I was going to try and go to a yoga class today at noon, but seeing as I now have 4 minutes to get there, that’s not going to happen.

I rested most of the day and felt a little better in the evening.

For several weeks now, I’ve been trying to make sure I take my treatment pills with my meals. The current treatment pill itself doesn’t need to be taken with food, but I know if I take all my supplements on an empty stomach I’ll feel nauseous. 

It made for some strange meal times if I happened to wake up late. I finally gave up trying to take the treatment pills at meal times. I’m shooting for taking them at 9am, 2pm, and 7pm. I set phone alarms to remind me.

I had some really strong food cravings this evening and I’m blaming it on PMS. I may or may not have had a few tortilla chips and a few cookies. It was all low FODMAP, but not paleo. I very nearly walked to the store and bought some potato chips, because crispy and salty sounds AMAZING. Thus far I have resisted, but not sure how long I can hold out.

I was super tired in the evening, but when I laid down to go to sleep my mind was running rampant due to a phone call I received. Sometimes when my mind won’t shut off, I imagine myself getting dressed, walking to the store, buying something, then coming back home. Normally this is so mundane I end up falling asleep partway through. But not tonight. I would make it from my room to my closet before my mind would wander off again. I started the exercise 5-6 times before I finally gave up.  After laying there a few hours, I happened to think of a girl I used to work with who told me she would listen to podcasts to help her fall asleep. I didn’t feel like searching for a podcast, so I looked on you tube for some sort of sleep aid. I found I few hour long videos that were stories for falling asleep. Here’s the one I listened to.

The narrators voice was enough to keep my mind loosely engaged on the story, and to keep it from running amok. I’m not sure how long I listened, but it feels like I got about halfway through.

Day 17

I slept a little longer last night, but didn’t feel rested upon waking. I ended up finding out later in the evening yesterday that I needed to run several errands today, and ended up having two visitors. 

The last few weeks more than 2 things per day tends to max out my capacity, so this felt like a test.

I had a friend drop by quickly in the morning to drop off some things. I then needed to box and print postage for 2 of my husband’s amazon orders. I don’t do this very often, so it takes 4 times longer than it needs to. I then needed to ship out the orders and go to the subway nearby to grab sandwich for my daughter since I was picking her up from school to have lunch together. After subway, I stopped by Macy’s to pick up my daughter’s homecoming dress, then went to her school to pick her up. She wasn’t feeling well, so she ended up coming home with me for a few hours to rest before I needed to take her back to school for cheer practice. When I got home I walked and fed the dogs right away because a storm was blowing in. About an hour after that, another friend came over for the evening.

While it is good to know I could manage everything, it definitely maxed my capacity. I don’t think it would have been possible earlier in the week when I was only sleeping ~6 hours per night.

My cycle started yesterday, and it was close to the predicted start date in my period tracker app. This is always good news for me; I used to have 40-60 day cycles. Now my cycles are more regular and occur approximately every 31 days. I hope this means that my hormones are in a better place than they were a few years back.

Since listening to a sleep story last night worked pretty well, I looked for another one and found a video that was based on Psalm 23.

I was physically uncomfortable last night, so it feels like I listened longer tonight than the night before. I do feel like these videos are helpful, so I will try to continue with them.

Day 18

I slept about 8 hours again last night, but am still waking up tired.  As I mentioned previously, the off balance feeling is gone, so the most noticeable symptom of the Xifaxan at this point is trouble sleeping.

My bowel movements are still happening daily, and are typically a 2 on the Bristol scale. There were a few days I haven’t had as much water, so I’m wondering if that might be the cause for the scale score.

I tried to be smarter with outstanding chores today. I had a few phone calls I needed to make, so while I made them I worked on a large pile of dishes from a few days ago, and watered all the indoor plants. Talking on the phone seemed to help overcome my chore inertia.

My husband had been gone on a business trip the last few days, but came home around lunch. I had a few other errands that had piled up over the week, so we went and ran a few hours of errands this afternoon. We headed back home around 5pm, and I was feeling pretty fatigued at that point.

It’s about 8pm now, and feel mentally and physically exhausted, but not sleepy tired.

I will be so glad when I’m off these pills and get rid of the caffeinated feeling! I’ve got about one more week to go before I switch to the metronidazole. I'm hoping It won't make me feel caffeinated!

One thing I realized yesterday is that if there are any days that I feel half way decent, I should be cooking something in bulk. I did make a small batch of muffins yesterday just to try them. I liked them, so the next time I feel ok I’ll make a double batch and freeze them.

Speaking of freezing things, I could have made more soup either yesterday or today, but I have no more of my preferred storage containers-  Ball wide mouth quart size jars.  I was able to get a dozen more jars today, so the next time I feel good I’ll be able to make another batch of soup.

Given the up and down nature of my energy levels, I still think one of the best things I can do for myself is to continue to cook in bulk when I can so I have the right kind of food to eat when I’m feeling tired.

Day 19

The fatigue is getting worse. It’s especially bad in the morning, but I start to feel more normal after 5 pm. I’m still trying to use the adult bedtime stories to fall asleep. They help to a degree, but I don’t know how much I can fight the side effect with other things.

I felt off balanced/lightheaded again this morning. I thought that side effect had faded. I was more tired this morning than previous days, so maybe that’s why I felt that way again.

I made two purchases today which may be helpful.
1. I got a squatty potty on clearance from Bed, Bath, and Beyond and was able to use a coupon, so ended up getting it for about $15. I’m excited to try it.

2. I finally paid for the Monash University FODMAP app (https://www.monashfodmap.com/i-have-ibs/get-the-app/). I’ve been increasingly frustrated with doing a google search for every food I might want to eat and decided the $8 was worth it. I haven’t had much time to look into it, but I anticipate it being helpful.

Day 20

I woke up several times last night. I was tired this morning and felt highly fatigued in the afternoon. Started to feel more normal after about 7:30 pm.

I had a chance to look more at the Monash food app today. I’m really frustrated that I didn’t buy it sooner. There have been various recipes I’ve looked at that ID a certain food or recipe as high or low FODMAP, but the designation really isn’t that straightforward. Most foods listed in the app have a volume at which the food contains moderate to high FODMAPs. The app also identifies which type of FODMAP/s that a particular food has. 

A few weeks back I found a recipe for zuchinni soup that was supposed to be low FODMAP. Well, it turns out Zuchinni is ok in a 1/3 c serving, but has moderate FODMAP content at ½ c. I have been eating large amounts of this soup multiple times a day. Since the soup is blended, I have no way to know how much Zuchinni I’ve been eating per serving. Unfortunately, Zuchinni is high in the one fodmap I have the most issues with: oligos-fructans.

I really wish I would have known about the app, bought it, and gotten used to low FODMAP eating BEFOREEEE I started the treatment plan. Thinking back on what I’ve been eating, I really haven’t been doing a great job at eating low FODMAP the last few weeks.

Who knows how much this will affect my treatment plan. As far as I can tell, treating SIBO is still an evolving sciencec. There are a few different diet recommendations that people with SIBO can follow, and low FODMAP is just one of them. I had previously read that some people try and eat FODMAPs while on antibiotics to activate the bacteria so that they are active enough to be killed off. Honestly, there probably is no one-size-fits all treatment or diet. Every body is different.

 I tried a stir fry recipe tonight trying to follow vegetable amounts from the app, and something in it caused symptoms. Maybe because I ate too much at once? I didn’t measure my serving size, but I was pretty sure it was all within limits. The only thing not in the app that I added were sweet potato glass noodles. Sweet potatoes are ok in smaller amounts, but the noodles were processed so they may have been different. I’m feeling discouraged.

Day 21

I woke up around 2 am with stomach cramps, which is the first time that’s ever happened. I’m assuming that was caused by something I ate for dinner yesterday. Eventually went back to sleep and woke up again around 9 am. Even though I feel like I slept enough overall, waking up is hard and mornings are slow.

This morning I needed to move a little faster to make it to our 10 am church service. Sometimes having a little motivation is helpful!

I felt pretty fatigued in the afternoon for a few hours, but was able to get some chores done later in the evening.

I’m still feeling wired/tired around bed time, and am trying to use some sort of adult bedtime story to help my mind calm down enough to sleep.

In listening to the bedtime stories, I learned something about focus that relates to my life in general. As I listen, my mind sometimes wanders and fixates on something- a conversation from earlier in the day, what needs to be done tomorrow, conversations I need to have, etc.

When I realize that my mind has drifted, it is possible for me to choose to continue with where my mind wants to go, or to return my focus to the story. Sometimes I choose to refocus on the story, and I can stay there. Most of the time I choose to focus on the story, and my mind drifts back to what I was thinking about again and again and again. Each time I realize the drift has happened, I can choose to refocus on the story.

I have a whole set of blog posts planned about the faith aspect of this journey that I haven’t finished yet. They are separate posts because that’s how I’ve operated the last few months- I focus on the physical, then I focus on the spiritual. Sometimes I spend more time focusing on the physical than I would like. I do need to be aware of the symptoms I am experiencing, but obsessing about them isn’t helpful. Being aware of the food I’m eating is necessary, but beating myself up for making a food mistake isn’t helpful.

Jesus once told his disciples: "My food," said Jesus, "is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work. John 4:34 NIV

Truly, it is spiritual sustenance that is keeping me going at this time.

Today I even moved on from ‘just keeping going’ to the type of sincere gratitude that makes you emotional all day. God has been SO GOOD to us, and I can see and feel how in all things He has been/is working for the good of those who love Him, and have been called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).