Thursday, May 7, 2015

All work and no play makes marcy a mess...

So I learned the lesson that actual work when out of balance with actual life is bad.  What I apparently failed to connect is things that are work-like also count against balance even though it wasn't actual work.
What am I talking about?
I decided to move in with my boyfriend in December, and since then I've been 'working' almost non stop to make it happen.  First it was purging stuff from the house, then it was the packing, then it was the moving (which happened over a period of a few months, since I was relativity close and could move jeep loads sporadically), and THEN it was getting my house ready to rent, which was WAYYYY more work and time than I ever expected.  Now that the house is rented, we have projects at our house- building and planting the garden, rearranging the basement, STILLLL unpacking....

It's been one thing after the other for about 5 months, with almost zero down time.

I've slowly been going downhill, but the last 2 or 3 weeks I've really noticed that I'm feeling off. It's funny- for only moving a half hour north to a town I was already familiar with, I feel out of place still.  I dont necessarily know where everything is, or where to go, or what to do.  There are events I never would have attended before on week nights because the drive was too far....and now it would be easy, but I never think about doing anything because I'm so used to living farther away.

One of the results of the above is that I haven't gotten out of the house much since I've moved, which was starting to drive me a little batty.

I also haven't been playing much music since the first of the year...being busy and stressed for me basically crushes any creative impulses I have.  I know from experience that I do better as a whole when I'm playing music, but it's hard to convince myself to play anything when I'm exhausted.

Now that I recognize all of this, it's time to get out of the house more, play more music, and enjoy the fact that I no longer have to deal with my house!


janzi said...

my dear girl, just happened on your blog and saw no comments, so I thought I would leave one.. it strikes me that you over analyse everything and probably are a perfectionist too** Not bad things in themselves, but they can cause a lot of angst if left to grow bigger.. With your new home, it takes time to feel relaxed in the surroundings and it will take a lot of getting around to find out all the best places to visit in the area and where to park, but it will happen that one day you will be very comfortable again.. dont give up and see problems all the time, you have a great boyfriend I am sure and a lovely new place to live, so try and deep breathing helps, to relax and make time to spend with your darling all on your own.. get him to show you all around his neighbourhood, thats the best way... good luck and hugs from across the pond.. I think you are also very brave, managing to do that climbing wow!!!

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